Our Only Guide Is Our Homesickness

installation / photography, audio, text
2019

 

“Ah, Harry, we have to stumble through so much dirt and humbug before we reach home. And we have no one to guide us. Our only guide is our homesickness.”

― Hermann Hesse, Steppenwolf


The title of this project was inspired by Will, who I met along with his dogs Ruby Tuesday and Queen Victoria. “It’s just my dogs and me. I don’t do a lot of talking to other folk,” he explained, before going on to tell me about his voracious appetite for books and his admiration of the author Herman Hesse. As Will revealed other details from his life, I observed my growing desire for the satisfaction of the whole story, my appetite for content. Then I had the realization that to share a moment in time with Will, and to see and hear him as he chose to present himself, was a privilege, and I was grateful. This is the posture of Our Only Guide is Our Homesickness.

The day that I met Will, I also had the opportunity to talk with other pet-owners who receive services from Downtown Dog Rescue. They graciously shared their anecdotes and musings about their lives and their furry friends. I present those conversations here not as “complete” narratives constructed through my outsider’s gaze but as moments whose abundant details become examinations of the depth, diversity, and universality of the human experience. Unlike in film, television, or video, image and sound from a singular point in time are separate and nonsynchronous. The still photograph becomes the focus of contemplation while the audio moves through time, providing context and texture. Though I admittedly have my specific gaze and point-of-view, my aim is to show—not tell—so the viewer can make their own connections.

Field of Eminence, the final piece of the series, is a collaboration with archivist Henry Apodaca. Components that make up the soundscape of Skid Row are isolated in order to bring attention to details that are so familiar that they often go unnoticed: traffic that mimics nature, conversations between animals, small yet unencumbered bursts of joy and love.

Luanne / Blue
Inkjet print, MP3 audio

Will / Ruby Tuesday and Queen Victoria
Inkjet print, MP3 audio

Desiree / Coco
Inkjet prints, MP3 audio

Marisa / Mugsee and Meechee
Inkjet print, MP3 audio

Denise / Bunny Jr
Inkjet print, MP3 audio

Bunny, Jr. died about two months after this interview. He was hit by a car as he ran out into the street. Denise’s finance Bunny rushed him to an animal hospital but it was too late.

Julie / Yoyo
Inkjet print, MP3 audio

 

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Home Is Where the Heart Is